Equality Equality Equality! We hear every other person talking about equality on every other day at every other place. It has been talked about to such an extent that the actual context which it should be crusading, has been thrown somewhere into oblivion. And now is nowhere to be found. I find it funny sometimes and a lot of times, a matter sheer manipulation. It’s funny how everyone has tempered and played with this word to suit their own whims and fancies. Not many would agree with me, I know, but it is just another sword oscillating around people’s neck, both men and women. Had it not surfaced in the first stance, life would have been much easier. I might not be skilled enough to tell exactly how equality must be fathomed but there is no taking away from the fact on how its interpretation has been ripped to shreds.
Equality – A donation?
When parents send girls child to schools, they don’t patronize. They do it as a part of their duty and out of love & affection. It is because they want their children to progress and learn the nuances of life. Those who take pride in showcasing this pursuit are the real culprits. Similarly, if a woman chooses to work post marriage, it is a decision that she makes. She need not be allowed by her husband & in-laws to be practising her fundamental rights as an individual. Those who take pride in showcasing this pursuit are the real culprits. Interestingly, I have also come across a set of species who kind of barter educated/working women for dowry, since the wagging tongues expect an auto transfer of ‘her’ salary into their kitties. Those are the real culprits. This is what equality had been reduced to, with zero hope to see the sunshine any soon.
Equality – Not normal?
My father says ‘incessant discussion of a topic kills its value’. There are men so discussed in the point above, ‘allowing’ their wives to work post marriage. These men are called ‘ALPHA MEN’. There are women (barring senior citizens) begging, crying, screaming for their marked spaces in public transport; walking out of marriages willfully and still asking for alimony; embezzling provisions relating to maternity leave to coax a handsome allowance out of companies. These women are called ‘ALPHA WOMEN’ and they exist too. The more Equality has been discussed, the more it has been consigned to an abyss. It has only garnered the alpha men a lot of attention and the alpha women a lot of sympathies. And hence, equality has only broken its back and now needs to see an Orthopediatrist.
I think one of the best steps, worth mentioning, ever taken by the Indian government a few years back was to generalize the income tax brackets for both men & women. Though I do not know if that was to promote equality. If that was the case, I haven’t seen many similar steps in any other sector.
Equality – An armour?
A mother is the most powerful being on this earth, and a housewife, the best administrator. And a blend of both is magical. If you have chosen to be either of these, trust me you are born to win a battle that not many can even survive. But how convenient it is to play blame games for not being able to achieve something, or for not being professionally inclined because you were busy managing homes? Yes, that happens. It is not only when you bash patriarchy that you decipher women empowerment. A woman should know where she belongs and a decision once taken, should be fulfilled wholeheartedly. The benign form of equality is to wear a perspective, acknowledge it and carry it with all the grace and trickle it down for the sake of posterity. Show equality in the right light. You can be a working woman, a housewife or house-maid for that matter.
In-Equality – Ingrained!
Over two decades now, we have raised our girls to become stoic heroes and walk in tandem with the world. We have taught them to drive cars, fly planes and combat every obstacle that comes their way. These virtues have led our girls to find their place and fight for it. But why haven’t we taught our boys to cook and told them that it is an essential life hack? That doing your own laundry is something they also need to learn? Why have we always shown them this picture about a girl who would come into their lives and cook their breakfasts, lunches and dinners?
Despite making our girls go out in the open, we haven’t let them get-off the same old conventional mindsets. “So what if she is working, household management is not a man’s thing.” It seems as if we have given alms to her and left her to sulk in her own agony. Metaphorically, it is like eating the cake and have it too. And men are clueless as to where have they faltered even after ‘allowing’ their women to work. This has eventually led to disheartening family chaos and fall outs.
Equality is possible only when you practice it. On your own, starting home. It is about taking charge of your actions, pervasive through all walks of life. Good or bad. It is about integrity and not about suitability. Equality is a choice and not an opportunity. It is more about pragmatism, less about emotions. Equality is about sharing the burden. It is in the actions and in the head. Equality is within you. Don’t go around asking for it.